"The poor have been systematically looted in this country. The rich have been made richer under this criminal, fascist president and his government." -- George Carlin, "Real Time" with Bill Maher
"I wanna bring up the Barbara Bush quote, I don't know if you heard this, but the president's mother -- and I tell you, the moron doesn't fall far from the tree... I brought this up last week which is U.R. -- unintentional racism -- alot of people are racist, and they don't know it. By the way, this is on camera -- it sounds like something you get caught saying off camera. She was talking about the fact that a lot the poor people from New Orleans are coming into Texas. She said, 'What I'm hearing -- which is scary -- is they all want to stay in Texas. And so many of the people in the arena were underprivileged anyway, so this is working very well for them.' I mean, Marie Antoinette couldn't have said it any better." -- Bill Maher, "Real Time" with Bill Maher
"Silver Douchebag is what I call her [Barbara Bush]." -- George Carlin, "Real Time" with Bill Maher
"There's a friend of mine who lives in New Orleans, is black, and I wrote down exactly, word for word, what she said, because I think it bears repeating. She said, 'After 9/11, I was American. Now I'm back to being black.' And I think among the feathers in George Bush's resume is that I think he has lost a whole generation of black people who might have felt that way after 9/11, and now are like, 'You know what? I can't believe I started to buy into that bullshit.'" -- Bill Maher, "Real Time" with Bill Maher
"I think that class and race are inseparable in America." -- Cynthia Tucker, Editor of the "Atlanta Journal-Constitution" on "Real Time" with Bill Maher
"Black people in this country, are still disproportionately poor. It is also impossible to talk about what happened in New Orleans without some white conservatives focusing on the looting, the crime, instead of focusing on the vast majority of poor, black people who were law-abiding, who were frightened themselves." -- Cynthia Tucker, Editor of the "Atlanta Journal-Constitution" on "Real Time" with Bill Maher
"I am not only from the richest country in the world, but the dumbest country in the world... This country was already financially and spiritually ruined before this hurricane ever hit New Orleans... It's a tragedy for me that he's president of my country... He doesn't know diddly-squat about economics or history or science or even how to speak well." -- Kurt Vonnegut, Author of "Man Without A Country" on "Real Time" with Bill Maher
"The administration does their old 9/11 trick 'It's too early to start apportioning blame. Let's get the bodies out of the water.' This is what they said after 9/11. 'Let's not politicize this.' Of course, it's the most political administration ever." -- Bill Maher, "Real Time" with Bill Maher
"And finally, New Rule: America must recall the president. That's what this country needs. A good, old-fashioned, California-style recall election! Complete with Gary Coleman, porno actresses and action film stars. And just like Schwarzenegger's predecessor here in California, George Bush is now so unpopular, he must defend his job against...Russell Crowe. Because at this point, I want a leader who will throw a phone at somebody. In fact, let's have only phone throwers. Naomi Campbell can be the vice-president!
Now, I kid, but seriously, Mr. President, this job can't be fun for you anymore. There's no more money to spend. You used up all of that. You can't start another war because you also used up the army. And now, darn the luck, the rest of your term has become the Bush family nightmare: helping poor people.
Yeah, listen to your mom. The cupboard's bare, the credit card's maxed out, and no one is speaking to you: mission accomplished! Now it's time to do what you've always done best: lose interest and walk away. Like you did with your military service. And the oil company. And the baseball team. It's time. Time to move on and try the next fantasy job. How about cowboy or spaceman?!
Now, I know what you're saying. You're saying that there's so many other things that you, as president, could involve yourself in...Please don't. I know, I know, there's a lot left to do. There's a war with Venezuela, and eliminating the sales tax on yachts. Turning the space program over to the church. And Social Security to Fannie Mae. Giving embryos the vote. But, sir, none of that is going to happen now. Why? Because you govern like Billy Joel drives. You've performed so poorly I'm surprised you haven't given yourself a medal. You're a catastrophe that walks like a man.
Herbert Hoover was a shitty president, but even he never conceded an entire metropolis to rising water and snakes.
On your watch, we've lost almost all of our allies, the surplus, four airliners, two Trade Centers, a piece of the Pentagon and the City of New Orleans...Maybe you're just not lucky!
I'm not saying you don't love this country. I'm just wondering how much worse it could be if you were on the other side. So, yes, God does speak to you, and what he's saying is, 'Take a hint.'" -- Bill Maher, "Real Time" with Bill Maher
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